Bad Christmas Gifts That Keep On Giving

I was 'talking' with Peg about Christmas gifts and how no one remembers from year to year what you gave or received. I reflected on that statement and agreed that no, I don't remember everything that I get for Christmas but I do have a few that I remember. Some in a good way, some in a not so good way. Being a teacher, I do get many a gifts, mainly Christmas decorations, that give me a smile every time I put them out and remember that student who gifted it to me; the kissing angels on my tree, the yarn Santa hanging on my wall, the collection of penguin hand towels in the guest bathroom.
But of all the gifts that we remember, the one that has the family laughing, is the Mr. Turtle Pencil Sharpener that was given to my young teenage son by my mother in law.
But first I need to give you some background information about my 'dear' mother in law.
My mother in law (MIL) is a very self centered woman who has her favorites and needless to say, none of my children were them during their early years. She would buy gifts for the other grandchildren, really nice gifts that one could see that she spent time, effort and money on, not so much for my sons. Case in point: one year, back in the 80's, was the year of the cabbage patch doll craze.

She went to a dozen stores looking for them, answering ads in the paper, finding them for all the grandchildren but mine. Before (and during) Christmas, we all got to hear how tedious this was but how successful she was in find all five dolls (and how much money she spent on them) for the other grandchildren. I asked why she didn't get one for my sons, her reply was,
"They won't know the difference."
I went out to the local Toys R Us and had my name added to the waiting list. My sons got the damn doll for Christmas, and I didn't have to pay nearly the amount my MIL paid for each one of hers.
There are many other examples I could give you, but know this, each time I confronted her about her gift giving habits, I would get excuses like the previous mention one and, my all time favorite,
"It's my money and I'll spend it however I like."
Yes it IS her money, but with time my children did start to notice the differences in the gift giving to the point where they didn't want or like going to her house. We would say the standard things like,  "It's the thought that counts," or "She's trying her best." and recently, "She's old and this could be her last Christmas Eve."
One can only imagine the responses the last one has gotten from the sons.
Over the years, we have turned her gift giving skills into a game we call 'Who got the worst gift' with the winner being the one who got to play Santa in the morning.
Again I can see many of you shaking your head at what you might think is rude behavior and I will admit that it is BUT the key here to know is that she has never taken the time to learn about my sons and what they like and don't like, need /don't need. Oh she would call or I would call with items on their wish lists, but I would usually get the same response of,
 "I don't like any of those as gifts." or "I don't buy that sort of thing,"
and under the tree that year would be something that they didn't want or like.
Of course there are few Christmases that she did listen to me, bought what they wanted, and the kids were ecstatic about them (one Christmas she bought all of them new roller blades. Hubby and I woke up at 3 in the morning hearing them rolling skating around the main floor. It was funny to listen to because part of area had carpeting so the sounds were muffled but as soon as they hit the kitchen floor, WHAM! it was like having a herd of elephants in the house!), but those Christmases were few and far between.
Our all time favorite bad gift was the year my second son was given a battery operated Mr Turtle pencil sharpener. What made this all the more funny was he was 13 years old, the age where they no longer see themselves as kids but mini adults.
She thought he would like it because at one time he liked Ninja turtles.
That was when he was six years old!
Plus this sharpener was meant for someone ages 3-6, or so the box said.
She admitted that she was at Radio Shack buying for someone else, saw it and got it for the son so that she could be done with her shopping.
That pencil sharpener sat on the headboard of his bed for several months. Whenever we would mention about going to his grandmother's house he would point to the pencil sharpener and say,
 "The one that gives crappy gifts like this?"
That summer, he found glee in taking it outside and smashing it into a thousand pieces.
And every Christmas since we talk about how the Mr. Turtle Pencil Sharpener has been the worst gift hands down.
Fast forward to last Christmas.
We've all tried and tried to find a battery operated Mr. Turtle Pencil sharpener for that son. He's to the point now where he'd find the humor in receiving it but to no avail. Instead my oldest found these:There are 100 of them and  last year Santa brought him the first one. Of course there will be one for each Christmas from here on out until I can the turtle pencil sharpener from years ago.
I do have an email in to the person that I lifted the photo from ;o)